I am packing boxes. My 1 year old is sleeping (thank heavens) and my 7 and 9 year olds are outside playing in the sunshine. My husband is already gone 2 states away working. So I am here packing. The last 5 weeks of a being a single parent, selling the house (which means keeping it clean all the time!), and packing have been exhausting to say the least. And I just keep wondering why. I know my husband got a better job somewhere else, but my friends, my support are here. I will miss them more than I can even say! Now I am sad AND packing boxes!
Broken December 18, 2007
Last week my nine year old daughter fell ice skating and broke her leg. It was an unfortunate event of being in the wrong place at the wrong time. She and one of the dads on the rink (who we know) got tangled up and he landed on her leg. Resulting in a spiral fracture of the tibia starting right above where the skates ended. The doc says they saved her ankle. I guess that is a good thing. Apparently the bone heals stronger, but joints are another story.
This is our second visit to the emergency room. The first was with the same daughter 3 years ago for a broken are, right above the elbow. That one required a trip to OR in order to set it and then a night in the hospital to make sure she did ok coming out of anesthesia. For some reason I managed to be strong for her and didn’t have to fight off the waves of nausea usually brought about by hospitals. But this time I was stuck in the hall with my head between my knees trying not to become a patient myself.
I could go into many angles of this whole experience right now…like how stupid EMT’s nurses are compared to the intuition of a mother, or how irate I was that they left my 9 year old to endure the pain and scream for 45 minutes straight, or how my 5 month old is sick from spending the day at the hospital where it is supposedly CLEAN and everyone washes their hands! Can you tell I HATE hospitals! That is why I have a mid-wife and family physician and we eat right and exercise and utilize natural remedies as much as possible. Because I think our Western medicine SUCKS!
The point I REALLY want to make here though, is how strongly connected a mother and child are. As much as I wanted to be strong for my daughter, I really felt her pain and her disappointment. She is a VERY active child, with hopes of her team taking first in indoor soccer this season, ice skating and swimming lessons, skiing this winter, and maybe some more basketball at Grandpa’s. Now she is stationary (and in a lot less pain thankfully) on the couch. It being Christmas, I really want to try to keep her spirits up. That is my sole task for my broken daughter right now!
Jealousy December 3, 2007
It will rot your soul. I have let it consume a very dear friendship of mine and I am trying vigorously to correct that. Don’t get me wrong, we all have our fair share of issues. But sometimes you look at another person’s life and you want to yell “Honestly, what on earth do you have to complain about?!??!”
She is at home raising her two sons who adore her. She has a supportive husband who makes a comfortable income for them. Her extended family is all close by and interested in being involved in her kid’s lives. She drives a nice car, shops if and when she needs or wants something, has supportive in-laws who adore her….and I am so freakin’ jealous!
My in-laws don’t like me to the point that they swear at me and hang-up on me on the phone, or they just conveniently forget to buy me Christmas presents. My husband has started a seriously failing business in all his immaturity and we are destined to lose everything we own! I work nights and then get up with three kids in the morning and try to put on a smile. My family lives 5 hours away and for the most part I am alone in this world to do the one thing that is most important to me…raise my kids!
Yet the one solitary support I have, I am destined to ruin because of my damn jealousy!
